One of the things that we stress about are outside (the norm) activities. People and activities out of our norm can be very stressful. We have to worry about food being served, crowds, loud situations, Carson's mood and yes, even Jay's and my patience level. We have missed many events or have broken them up due to the stress of going out.
As a mom, one of the worst stresses is playing with other kids Carson's age. Carson has tons of interaction with other kids at school and with his cousins but that is it. We don't really hang out much with other people with children besides family.
This is in part due to how we don't know how Carson will act or, how other kids will be with him. Carson is either very interactive (to the point of annoyance) or he will ignore you.
For example, this winter a little girl came over to play when we were outside building a snowman. She was trying to talk with Carson and he was ignoring her but did give her a few responses. She then asked me how old he was and when I told her, she asked me why he spoke like a baby. Believe it or not, that made me cry. It was so hard to realize that he is getting to an age where other kids may notice that he is different. I know she did not mean any harm but as a mommy, I am very sensitive to others accepting and loving my child.
This week Jay's dad (Bill) was in town and came over to visit the kids. We had a nice visit and when he was leaving Carson decided he wanted to go with him. That was not going to work, but we did have him put a jacket over his PJ's and walk grandpa out to his car.
When we were out there, the two families across the street were out playing in the front yard. Our neighbors are very nice and even though we have only lived here one year, we have chatted from time to time.
When the kids saw Carson, they ran over and asked him to come over and play. The older little girl said - "can he come over and play?". I asked Carson if he would like to and he was giggling and happy and said "yes". I took him across the street where he played chase, rolled on the grass, laughed and interacted with kids he hardly knew.
When it was time to leave he asked for "5 more minutes" and I said okay. In my mind, I was stressing about leaving as there could be a huge meltdown. After 5 minutes, I reminded him we had to leave and all was well. With some prompting, he thanked his friends and their parents and we walked home.
It was amazing. It may sound silly to so many of you but this is huge for us. He interacted, spoke and engaged in other kids! Kids he did not know! Most of all, he was happy and joyous as he played and ran and laughed.
That is all I want for him. I want him to be happy and not to struggle with "out of the norm" situations. I want him to be accepted for who he is and others to see the amazing, beautiful spirit that I do.
We will get there. These moments of boring and typical fill me up and affirm to me that we are almost there. We can do this! We will never give up on him!
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