Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy Father's Day

I am so very lucky to have an amazing father to my children. I knew Jay would be a good dad but to be honest, he totally exceeded my expectations.

When we met, Jay and I lived a very carefree and fun life. We enjoyed our freedom and traveled, shopped, socialized and kept busy. When we had Carson, I really thought that I would change more than he would. The truth is, Jay has changed more than I have.

Five years later, Jay is perfectly happy hanging out with his kids over doing anything else. I have to force him to take time for himself and to occasionally do something with friends and family that do not involve the kids or I.

Since he works all day, all he wants to do is see the boys when he gets home. He is not preoccupied with sports or personal travel. The only thing he really does like to do is Facebook. That is his social outlet and he enjoys chatting and catching up with friends that way.

Sometimes I think he needs to get out more. I think he needs to take more time for himself and relax. It might sound crazy, but I am the wife talking him into going out when the invitations arise. He is just content with being at home.

If you knew Jay five years ago, you know what I am talking about. He was always up for an event, party or night out. He still enjoys these things but rather do them once in a while vs. all the time. What is really sweet, is he also does not like to do these things with out me. He will take a night out with me vs. a night out with the boys anytime. Believe me, I know this is rare and how lucky I am.

When Carson was first diagnosed we were so scared. I started reading the statistics that parents of children on the spectrum have an 86% divorce rate. We were and are determined to not add to those statistics. The best part is, when most dads (sorry it is true. it is mostly the dads) unplug with a special needs child, Jay did the opposite and charged ahead. He has been the driving force on so many of the therapies we have tried and will try. We have both found our role in all of this and have our areas of expertise. I am so lucky to have a true partner in all of this. Most of all, Carson and Fin have a dad that they know loves them without bounds and will do anything for their well being.

When Jay started wanting another baby a few months ago, I will be honest. I was not as ready as he was. I was a new stay at home mom just trying to find a new routine. After consideration, I realized that I could not deny him of the BEST thing he does. Yes, I am the one pregnant and the one that will deliver but Jay is also right there by my side all the way. He would do anything for the three (almost four) of us. The closer we get to delivery, the more and more excited I get. I can't wait to see him with a daughter. I know the love and protection will be the same but she too will bring out another side to him that I have not see yet.

Happy Father's Day Jay! Thank you for all you do for all of us. I hope you know how loved and appreciated you are. I am so lucky to have you on this journey with me.

I Love you - Em and the boys (baby girl too)


Happy Father's Day also to all the other wonderful Father's in our life!


Anonymous said...

Such a "great" man, father and husband - you can add son-in-law to the mix.

Anonymous said...

The world needs more daddies and hubbies like Jay. He's definitely "plugged in"! Kudos to Marianne as well.

Keep laughing and loving!